Two events during the year cause me to get deeply introspective & reflective; new year's & my birthday. It's strange how each year comes & goes, slow paced & rushed at the same time. Sometimes it seems like it was just yesterday I was turning sixteen, and in many ways it feels like a lifetime ago.
'If I knew then what I know now' is such a cliche thing, but if I knew then what I know now.... I can't even tell you how much lighter teenage kae would've felt. 
Happier. Freer. I guess that's the point of aging, though, learning what matters & how to grow & love & breathe.
Some things I've learned this twenty second year:
Surround yourself with good energy It's true what they say; you become the people you spend time with. If you're with negative nancys or energy-suckers all the time, it's eventually going to drain you. Be picky with who you choose to let in & give your energy to. 
& once you choose your people.... hold on to them!
Life isn't on a timeline No matter what society makes you think, you don't have to have done this or that in life by a certain time. NEVER do something just because it's what you're "supposed to." 
Carve your own path, even if it looks vastly different than those around you. It's not a race.
Give yourself a break You will fail & make SO MANY mistakes. We're human, it's what we do. 
It's okay. It doesn't make you a bad person. With each mistake and failure God gives us an opportunity to grow. If all you can accomplish some days is pushing the 'next episode' button, you're not a failure for that. 
Life is a balancing act.
HERE'S TO TWENTY THREE. (lowkey sad '22' is no longer my theme song okay byyeee)
xo,

HOW TO BE HAPPY

{outfit deets found here}

Exactly one year ago I was standing in the middle of a crowd of 60,000 strangers listening to the girl that connected all of us. 
At some points it was less of a concert & more like a therapy session with your best friend, & during one of those therapy moments she mentioned the importance of diagnosing happiness. I can't remember the exact quote, but the jist of it was that happiness is fleeting, & so it's important to recognize when it happens and let it happen. 
In this moment, I am happy.
My mind clicked, & in that moment, I was in fact, indescribably, purely, happy. Since then, I've been trying to remember to do that, to recognize the moments of happiness. Because it is fleeting sometimes. Life isn't always good, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't get to enjoy it while it is. Why SHOULDN'T you let yourself be happy? Let yourself take on the mind of a child & laugh until you can't breathe. Stand out in the sun & feel the sharp blades of grass against your bare feet. Live. 
I don't think there's an exact formula for true happiness. It's different for everyone, but the basics are universal. Things aren't always going to be good. You may have a bad day, or a bad month, even a whole dang year. But that doesn't mean you can't find the good & the happy or that you don't deserve it. You do. & if you look hard enough, most times it's there, waiting for you.   Sometimes it's in the form of a person, a puppy, or even in a giant, beautiful slice of pizza. There's magic in everything. 

xo,

Three Ways To Be Creative This Week

When my creativity dwindles I feel like doing even the most simple of tasks is daunting & I feel like I need a change of pace like, IMMEDIATELY. I'm one of those people that feel like they have to be inspired at all times to get things done, & unfortunately it's just..... not there some of the time. 

SO I'm willing to try basically anything if it means getting my juices flowing. Anyone else the same way??

A few simple ways to spark some spice in your life this week:

Podcasts

I've been getting a little into podcasts recently (this one, to be specific) & they're kind of a great way to see things from different perspectives and learn something new. There's fun & laid back podcasts like the skinny confidential, and then there's more "serious" ones that you can find all over itunes. Whichever one is more your speed.

Change of scenery 

If I'm in the same place for too long I start to feel fidgety & complacent. I find that I can't get things done as efficiently and I JUST WANT OUT! So, change up the pace a little. Go to a different room in the house, sit outside for a minute, grab some coffee from a coffee shop. You never know what might spark something.

Discover a new love

Trying out new creative outlets is something I need to get better at. What's something you've always wanted to try but have been iffy about? For me it's watercolor. I can't draw for ANYTHING, so what's the point in trying anything that has to do with art, right? Here's to taking my own advice.

Yikes.

Okay, okay. Tell me some of your favorite ways to get creative!

xo,

Breast Reduction 101 (Part Two)

Hey hi! SO, remember our chat last week? We left off right before the surgery, so now let's get into the nitty-gritty of the actual process & recovery.  
I don't actually remember too much about the day of, at least before. I can't even tell you what time the surgery was scheduled for, but I do remember it was very early morning. One memory that sticks out to me- and one that I use as an anecdote on my anxiety- is when I was in the pre-op room getting hooked up to everything. By that point my whole body was on edge & when I got hooked up to the heart monitor it was preeetty obvious. One of the nurses even looked at me, with her concerned nurse's face on, and said, "Sweetie, do you have a heart condition??" Nope, just anxiety that makes my heart beat 5000x past the normal range, no big. 
Anyway, after that is when things start to get fuzzy. They wheeled me into the OR, put the anesthesia mask on, & the next thing I know I'm in outpatient recovery. Apparently I'm a hit on anesthesia so I can only imagine the show I was giving the nurses LOL. They gave me a mirror to look at my chest and it was kind of a surreal moment.
After awhile they let my parents come into the room & had me sit in a chair, & that's when I think I actually realized "oh hey, I'm in pain." And y'all, there was pain. It was like an elephant sitting on my chest? But once they started me on pain meds all was good. In fact, it was so good that I'm pretty sure I slept the whole way home.......
The total recovery time was about four-ish weeks, right on schedule with Christmas break. The first few days were really rough. The recliner was my temporary home & if I wasn't asleep from the meds, I was in pain. I think the pain was pretty much gone within two weeks, (don't worry, each day was better than the last) I still just had to be careful about what I did. When I was cleared to wear a "real" bra I was sooooo happy about it. (VS was too, since they got all my money that day)
I'm still happy about it. By now there is only tiny scars, but I don't mind them anyway. It's a small price to pay for such a good thing. Before I actually had plastic surgery, my views on it were a little skewed. Now, not so much. Of course I believe in embracing your flaws & loving yourself, but if you are really unhappy & want to change something, you do you. That's not to say you should get procedure-happy a-la Heidi Montag, but maybe there's a happy medium? I say all this to say that I do not regret my surgery, one bit. I no longer cry in the dressing room because my chest won't cooperate with anything. I no longer feel like my proportions are out of place. I can't say the surgery took all of my confidence issues away, but it has helped tremendously. 
Luckily everyone in my life was super supportive, but unfortunately that's not always the case, as the "it's like slapping God in the face" (why do people think saying that is cool anyway? ANYWAY) & comments of the like seem to be popular. BUT guess what. It's your body. If you're ever thinking about this surgery, do it. For yourself, your health, and your happiness. Those that matter will support you, trust me. The topic of plastics (hey, Grey's) is no longer taboo by any means, but for some reason I feel like breast reductions still are. Wonder why. #feminism am I right? Seriously though, if anyone ever has questions on this topic, don't be afraid to email, snapchat, call me beep me.... Lemme know if these posts have helped you!  xo,

Breast Reduction 101 (Part One)

*READ PART TWO HERE

I've been meaning to write this post for awhile, but it's kinda gnarly. It's not a topic I'm ashamed of or scared to talk about by any means, I've just been putting it off, mainly because of the possibility of it becoming a novel if I don't split it up into two parts, so that's what I'll do. 

Part one (this one, if you didn't guess) is more of a chat on my decision to get a breast reduction (wait, this wasn't some weird April fools thing? you ask) & I think part two will detail more of the actual process, recovery, and afterthoughts.

SO. This topic is not for the faint of heart, or for the guys. (are there even any of you out there?) SORRY. Unless a guy stumbles upon this who wants to read about it, which is totally fine. Just don't be weird about it, yeah? 

PSA over. 

Remember how last summer the topic of breast reductions was sort of thrust into the spotlight when Ariel Winter got vocal about hers? My little heart swelled at her being so open and that's when I knew I needed to share my own story at some point. WDAC is all about sharing advice, stories, & inspiration, after all. No BS. So. I've had plastic surgery. That still feels weird to say sometimes, ha.

Anway, let's start from the beginning shall we?

I guess you could say I was an early bloomer. Like, kinda ridiculously so. I skipped right over the training bras and into buying shirts two sizes too big just so they would fit comfortably over my chest. By the time I was fifteen I was CONSTANTLY having to layer because if a top was any lower cut than a crew neck, forget it. I felt kind of ashamed by my chest size? Looking back I truly think that's where some self esteem issues stemmed from. It was a constant inner (and outer) battle, but I tried to learn how to live with it. I became accustomed to getting looks from gross middle age men and searching through tears for clothes that would work with me.

But it was getting old fast, because it wasn't just a self esteem issue; it was a physical one.

I've been 4'10" (& a half LOL) since maybe eighth grade. Like I said, I started early, so I stopped growing kinda early too. (even though my chest didn't) Most of me is smaller proportioned..... and then there was my chest. It made everything look so... weird. I honestly don't think my body handled having these things very well. It couldn't. The more into my teenage years I got, the more my back ached. I have minor scoliosis & there's no way the extra weight helped any. My shoulders were tense constantly (even more so than from my anxiety) and my body just felt off. I felt uncomfortable all the time. 

{Summer 2011. Apparently that was the summer of taking photos in hats
 in the middle of Charming Charlie & for naked eyebrows.}

I often vocalized my frustrations to my mom because I knew she understood; she had had a reduction as a teen, and she even suggested that I kept an open mind about one for myself in the future. Part of me wanted to just deal with it like I had been, but I couldn't see myself going through the rest of my life like that. So, after A LOT of thinking/praying/researching, by the summer I turned eighteen I had decided I wanted to do it.

I honestly don't remember a whole lot about the "before" process of researching for a surgeon & all that. (Maybe I blocked it out LOL) I just remember one day my mom taking me downtown to Dr. Schuster (definitely recommend) for a consultation & I'm pretty sure I was terrified, but once we actually got in the room and started talking I felt more at ease. Looking at some before & after photos of previous patients solidified it for me; he knew what he was doing. The only hurdle was waiting to see if insurance was going to cover it (because most insurances don't cover plastic surgery unless it's considered "medical"- ugh) but Dr. S. was confident we wouldn't have any problems. 

He was right- a couple weeks later we got confirmation that it would be covered & I was set. We scheduled the surgery for over Christmas break (Dec. 17, 2012 to be exact) since I was in my freshman year at college & could be home for a whole month of recovery.

By this point the anxiety was eating me away. On the one hand I was SO READY (the only way I can describe the feeling is like when you're ready to chop your hair & you JUST CAN'T WAIT) but the other hand...... I was convinced I wouldn't make it off the operating table. Up until that point, the biggest procedure I'd had was an endoscopy & I even freaked out for that! It was a waiting game and I was losing. 

WHEW okay I think this is where I'm gonna stop it for part two.... because we all love cliffhangers. It should be up at some point next week! In the meantime, have any of y'all had a BR or other plastic surgery? I wanna know your take.

xo,

Three Things To Do On A Monday

I've been following Michael Bosstick on snapchat (seriously, if you don't follow him & Lauryn you're MISSING OUT.) and guy's got some solid advice on business & life. A piece of that advice? 

Mondays don't have to suck.

I know. It was a shock for me, too. But seriously, why is Monday always treated like Cinderella before the ball? So the weekend's over. Another one comes in five days; why not make the most of Monday?

Here are some keys for productivity: 

Reset

Attitude is key. When I was school & my anxiety got bad over tests, my dad used to tell me that if I was adamant I wouldn't do well, the mindset would likely stick and I might not do as well as I could. Same applies here. If you're already in that "I hate Monday" mood, then things are likely to go downhill. Reset your focus & mindset. Meditate, take a shower, whatever you gotta do.

Review your week

I always like to do this on Sundays, especially when it comes to blog stuff. BUT you should take Monday as the day to reinforce your plans. Know your goals for the week & make those to-do lists. 

Catch up on reading

Books, blogs, whatever your favorite method is. We take in knowledge without even realizing it- even by checking twitter trends. (because who has time in the AM for a novel) When I read stuff about other people doing stuff, kinda makes me want to do something, too. 

See? Monday can be cool! Well, we'll give it an A for that effort.

Lemme know what you like to do to make Mondays productive! I could use more tips HA.

xo,

Four things to Do When You're Sick

As I write this I'm sitting on the couch breathing through my mouth and trying to stay alive. So glam.

Although curling up with netflix does make things a little less painful, being sick is never ideal. You've got things to do, places to go, but you're stuck. Luckily, there's a few things you can do (besides wallow) to pass the time a bit:

Yoga

I know, I know. The last thing you want to do when you don't feel well is lots of twisty turns and poses. But there are lots of gentle routines you can do that will make you feel so much better. This is my favorite.

Catch up on your reading.

It usually takes me either five days or five months to finish a book, so any downtime is useful.

Do some online shopping.

Just don't fall down the rabbit hole. It's easier to do than it looks.

Drink all the tea.

Mix in some honey and you'll be good to go in no time. Or one can only hope.

How do you make yourself feel better?

 

Finding Your Blogging Voice

It will be two years next month since I started blogging regularly, (times flies when you're having fun) and soon after when I decided I wanted to get "serious" about it. In that time, the blog has gone through a few transitions and it took me awhile to really find my blogging voice. Now I feel like this blog is really "me", but at times I wasn't quite sure what my voice was, and I think sometimes a lot of bloggers feel that way, especially newer ones. 

So how can you establish a strong voice while staying real? (I'm starting to hate the term authentic, so we'll go with real)

Think about details of your personality. How can you incorporate it into your online voice? I'm sarcastic and sometimes witty, so most times that carries over to my writing.

Find inspiration. Look at some of your favorite blogs and the voice they've established. What makes them so relatable and readable? Figure out it for you, too.

Write the way you talk in real life. This probably seems like a duh thing, but when I first started blogging I sort of thought I needed to sound "professional," almost as if I was writing a newspaper instead of a blog. For some bloggers the more serious tone might fit their brand more, which is totally fine. But don't lose your personality either- it never hurts to be cas sometimes. (See? We can all be hip with the times)

You won't find a consistent voice right away, but with time it'll become like second nature and you'll woo everyone away with your unbeatable charm. And if not, at least you'll woo yourself.

When Things Get Overwhelming

I don't know about you, but I'm all all about those moments you feel like you have it all together. They're fleeting and when they happen you know it's too good to be true. 

One minute it's chill and then suddenly you're about to move and go back to school at the same time while trying to manage a blog, a job, and life and you're running on overdrive and caffeine and you're certain you're not gonna make it. (Totally hypothetical situation, obviously)

HOW DO YOU MAKE IT?

Chill out. This sounds oh so much easier said than done, but if you take a sec to just chill and make a plan, you'll feel sooo much better. (Yoga breaths make all the difference)

Make a game plan. (Wow nice segway) Write down everything that needs to be done and figure out what it will take to achieve it. You'll also have a clearer head once it's no longer all scattered up there.

Prioritize. (AKA the one I'm terrible at) Once you've got your list made, prioritize it. The things you're dreading most are usually the things that should go on top...... And all those distractions that you procrastinate for hours with? coughpinterest. Get rid of them. 

Disconnect. Sometimes it's less about what you have to do that's overwhelming and more that you feel out of control of a situation, which is never fun. When you disconnect from the world for a sec, you have that moment to breathe and get it together.

How do you handle yourself when it's a thousand miles an hour? Spill.

College Advice From a (Semi) College Dropout

My college experience hasn't been the typical one. I was there for three semesters, then took a break that turned into a "not going back" that turned into deciding on community college. #struggles

When I grew up watching the college years of Boy Meets World and Sister, Sister, I had high expectations. But come to find out, everyone has a different experience and sometimes you end up on a different path than you started on.

I don't regret the path I chose, but there are some things I'd go back and do differently the first time.

In fact, I actually made all these mistakes just so I could tell you what not to to.

Just kidding. 

Preparation is key. A lot of times a class' syllabus will be online before class even starts. Look at it. Familiarize it. Have an organization system. Get your books.  

Get out of your comfort zone. College is this whole new world that can be overwhelming to unsuspecting eyes, and your default will be to stay with what's comfortable. One of my biggest regrets is not rushing with a sorority, even though I truly wanted to. I couldn't get out of that comfort zone long enough.

Be active on campus. Even at smaller schools, there are sooooo many different clubs/ organizations/ etc. to be involved in and so many friends to be made. There is literally something for everyone. 

Don't get lazy. When the going gets tough and netflix is calling your name, remember that resistance is the hardest part. Once you make it through that, get to work. Finish the essay, study for the final until your pupils no longer exist...... whatever you gotta do. 

Just, don't be a lazy babe, k?

Take advantage of office hours. Need to ask your prof a question? Does that entire math worksheet need an explanation? (Don't they all) Professors have office hours for a reason, so use them. 

Get to know your roommate. (One thing I did right) I've heard about a thousand roommate horror stories over the past few years, but luckily none of them were my own. In most cases the roommate situation is one extreme or the other, and sometimes bad experiences are just unavoidable. But when they're good, they're good. 

Make the most of it. Not to sound like a cheeseball, but college is really what you make of it. It's okay if you don't know your major or what you're gonna do after graduation or even what you're gonna have for breakfast the next day. (Probably coffee and stale cheez-its) 

Believe me, the majority of people on campus are in the same boat. So just make everything you can out of it and go get smarter and stuff.

Anything you'd add to this little advice-giving sesh?

Getting back to the real world after vacation

I'm thoroughly convinced vacations are not part of one calls the "real world." 

Oh no, they are on a level all their own, complete with some sort of magical fairy dust and you never want to go back.

But, you must. So how do you float back down from the vacation cloud to real life routines?

Unpack first thing. When you get back home, the urge to leave everything packed for a bit and just take a nap or netflix the day away is strong. But I guarantee if you get everything back in its place, you'll feel better and everything will seem "normal."

Go to work. Even if you're not going straight back to work, act like you are. Check emails, whatever it takes to get you back in that mindset. It'll make the real thing seem like a breeze. Maybe. 

Rest up. When your mind is clear, you can get back to the grind with a little more ease. So there, you've got an excuse to sleep in!

What do you do to get your head out of the vacation cloud? 

Tell me!